Friday, June 22, 2012

Blogging as a private person

Guys I am having a problem. I keep running into bloggers block (new term that I am probably not the first person to think of), and I think I know why. I am a very private person, and for some reason the knowledge that this blog is anonymous does not sufficiently reassure my private brain. I have seen many times that the best blogs are the ones in which the writer shares deeply and honestly, and I know I do not do that. I share tidbits and stories, but when it comes to the deep stuff, I always think,'oh I can't write about that.' Lame right? I do the same thing in my friendships though. I am always being careful not to reveal too much, to keep certain parts of me well guarded. I hide my struggles and my weaknesses.

So my question to you our lovely readers (the proud, the few) is how do you decide what to share on your blogs and what to keep private? Then, how do you challenge yourselves to share more deeply in your blogs? I see in my life that the profound encounters occur when we share deeply of ourselves,and as a mirror image blogging is the same. We learn and grow when we are vulnerable, but of course we must be sure to use that vulnerability wisely. So tell me, how do you keep a good balance?



  1. I think what works for me sometimes is to write something and then think about it for a day or so whether I want to hit publish. If there's a part of me that still wants it out there, I screw up my face and hit publish and hope for the best. You do have to be careful about oversharing (even though I try to keep my blog fairly anonymous, I also try to assume that it's not really that anonymous), but I can tell you that it has really been awesome when you write something and someone else knows exactly what you mean or they were maybe helped by something you said. It's worth the vulnerability!

  2. So much more of me is on my blog than is ever put out there IRL. My one rule is no bashing of The Man. That is not how I honor him or our marriage - by airing our dirty laundry. Asking for prayers for difficult times? Yes. Bashing - no. (Not that you've done that by any means, just my one rule.)

    I sometimes forget that people I know IRL read my blog and wonder if they think I'm fake either online or in person because I'm much more raw and honest online...I shed more tears while blogging than I have ever while discussing our IF in person. I'm quite sure some of my friends think I'm making up how bad it hurts.

    As Catholic Mutt said, what keeps me going and sharing the tough stuff is that when I get the comments that assure me I'm not alone, I feel so much better. There is also a huge power in prayer, knowing that others are praying for you, thinking of you, lifting you up - really reminds us that we are all part of the Body of Christ.

  3. I've had somewhat of a "blog break", but its been unintentional. I've just been busy. I have so many thoughts, I just can't remember them all at the right time. I did find that my phone has a microphone so I can say what I'm "deep-thinking" about and then write it down later. I always think of stuff to blog about in the shower, while driving, etc. If it doesn't get written down, I'm screwed!
    I like what CM said about writing the blog post, then going back a few days later and seeing if you want to publish it. I've done that before. It does really work! I am usually a foot-in-mouth gal. :-)

  4. I think this is a great question. I am stuck in "private mode" (with my blog literally private) b/c I've struggled with this. Part of my issue is audience... my blog was never anonymous so whenever I go public again, in theory family and friends could find me, and the way I write on my blog may not be the same tone/words I would use when interacting w/them IRL. In fact, it could do some damage if I unknowingly had certain loved ones reading.

    I also tend to be an open book IRL (if I am not in a large crowd), and I've struggled with how open to be in my writing bc I think in the past I've crossed lines w/out realizing it just due to my natural openness. All this to say, I hear ya... and I am still trying to figure this out!

  5. Wow lots of good feedback!

    Catholic Mutt, I really like the writing ahead of time idea.

    Rebecca, yes I also avoid any husband bashing. If I need to vent or talk something out a coffee date with a good friend is better, and not permanently published on the internet for all to see :)

    All in His Perfect Timing, it seems that if I'm not consciously scheduling writing time for myself I end up in an unintentional blog break. The kids make sure of it.

    Sarah, yeah it would be tough to go from private back to public. I have kept a public blog before, and always had a hard time keeping up with it because I kept it so shallow that I bored myself.

    Thanks for all of the advice guys!