I'm Wide Awake

And have been since about 3:30am. Ugh. Not blogged for months, you might think that this will be a carefully considered post filled with all sorts of things I've been contemplating and doing. Unfortunately, it's not.

My insomnia tonight arises from being so angry and upset that I cannot even get any rest. What has happened? you ask. If I may, some back story:

Once upon a time January 10th, I lost my job. At the time, I was in the throes of all day, all night morning sickness. Husband and I agreed that we would try to make a go of things on his salary alone, because that was what we hoped to do when Baby was born. When I finally started feeling like a human again, I picked up a second day at the bookstore at which I've been working, but these aren't even full days, and I'm not even an official employee. Honestly, the owner is so nice to me and I like it so much, I'm just glad I have somewhere to be two days a week.

A few weeks ago, shake-ups started happening at Husband's job. They were continuations of shake-ups from last year, but as soon as they began, Husband became very worried. Someone new was put in the #2 spot in the company, and he has always disliked Husband and the various people Husband used to report to before they were all fired last year. Well, this #2 guy (teehee, I'm enjoying calling him that), sent Husband home for a day so he could "get a lay of the land" in Husband's department (I'm pretty sure that's code for sit in his office and rifle through Husband's computer and physical files). About a week and a half later, this past Friday, he comes into Husband's office at close of business and says that Husband is fired. Husband takes it pretty well and asks what the terms of the separation are. #2 guy says he'll be in touch next week with the details, but in the mean time, he needs to pack up and leave and turn in his key immediately.

Monday comes...nothing.

Tuesday comes...nothing, so at the advisement of numerous people, Husband writes a letter to the president, #1 guy, if you will, asking for severance payments in line with what is in the employee handbook, as well as a letter of recommendation. He closes with some tasteful (imo) heart-string tugging about why these matters are urgent: recent personal struggles, like me having lost my job, having had the tumor and surgeries last fall, and finally the good news that we're expecting our first child. Just, you know, to appeal to the man's humanity.

Wednesday comes...nothing. Unless you count the emails from the guy who replaced Husband. Oh, BTW, #2 guy told Husband that the department was being shut down, but of course on Monday, the guy under Husband was promoted to Husband's exact position. Anywho, where was I? Oh yes, the first email was a request that Husband come in and help "transition" things over. Husband responded by saying he is currently consumed with figuring out how to take care of his family, but he wished him all the best. The email in response to that was pretty similar, please come in, "#2 guys says it's ok," I need your help and I want to make sure nothing falls through the cracks. Husband and I discuss this. According to Husband, everything is in the office. This guy just needs to open up files and read them. So Husband responds to this guy with something along the lines of "I understand your position, but until I receive details of my separation from the company, I think it is best that I not come in."

That's when the voicemail comes. Replacement guy says "You have to come in, I've heard this from the top, or they're going to be not so nice about it."

I am sorry, did you just threaten my husband, you little punk? Did you just relay a threat that implied that Husband will be denied the benefits due to him if he doesn't do what you say? And has Husband heard anything from anyone with actual authority? No. If they were to contact him and say "Let's talk about severance," Husband is such a good guy that he'd totally help his replacement figure stuff out. He's just that nice. But no. I'm glad he's out of this messed up place, but I am also getting so worried. When I was fired, I was handed a packet AT THAT SAME MEETING with details regarding my severance and how and when to apply for COBRA and unemployment. At Husband's company, they didn't even think ahead enough to realize that this is one of Husband's department's busiest times of year, and they'd need a transitional period with him still there. They don't care enough about anyone to do them the courtesy of having someone on staff versed enough in HR matters to create a termination packet. For Pete's sake!!!

I'm sorry, this was a huge rant, and you didn't need to be subjected to it. I just don't know what the future holds even more than usual, and if I don't get this out now, I'm afraid I'll not sleep for a week. Whenever we talk to our parents, my mom likes to remind me that we have a baby on the way, so we have to figure this out; Husband's parents keep offering for us to move in with them. Please, God, don't make us need to resort to that. I put in my first full-time job application yesterday, and will continue to be applying for what I conisder to be real jobs from now on. I just hope that if I manage to swing an interview for anything, they don't see my pregnant belly and immediately cross me off the list. Jesus, please help Husband get a new job soon. It would be good for him in so many ways. Thank you.

-January