Wednesday, December 21, 2011

How the last few months have really put us through the ringer


The month of December has been a rough one. Particularly these last couple of weeks. Really it was set off by me losing my job in October, but really came to a head in December. This entire month it has felt like we are hemorrhaging money. I have been a huge Grinch about Christmas I am sure, since I'm always calculating what we can spend. Lots of other things have been getting to me as well. So since I know you are interested, here are my complaints.

1. Finances/Jobs: Why are finances so dang hard? On the up side I just started a new job which I think will make things a bit more stable. But then I worry how I will handle working with a two year old and a newborn? So now I have two jobs, and two kids, and I don't know how I will do it all. I'm hoping this baby is pretty easy like L, since if we had something like colic come up it would get...interesting. A has been looking at new jobs and even had an interview a few days ago mainly because it would be so helpful if he could just make more. I know it kills him that we can't make it on his paychecks alone.

2. Kids: L has come into a new kind of phase that A keeps calling the terrible twos. I'm afraid he is correct. Mainly she is throwing lots of tantrums and has taken to demanding, well, everything. If her demands are not met then tantrum. It was still manageable until she started having sleeping issues. She has been going to bed at 7pm every night since she was 8 months old, and as often as people told me we were really lucky, I guess I forgot that it is the most awesome schedule ever. Suddenly she is resisting bed time and each night has become a struggle. I keep thinking she needs a later bed time, but she seems so grouchy and tired from 5pm on, that I have kept trying to get her to sleep earlier.

So this is where it gets interesting. Last night L completely lost it, and A put her to bed right about 7 since we agreed she must be tired from a busy day and needed to have some alone time to just go to sleep (gentle bedtimes have been rare lately). We put her to bed and could hear her yelling, "NO NO NO!!" from her bedroom, but knew she would soon tire out. I was just letting my heart rate from the day go down, when L suddenly emerges from her room, walks into the living room and begins bellowing her displeasure at being put to bed. Holy crap, she can now climb out of her crib. And open her door. And apparently she learned to do these things on the same night.

She finally went to sleep in her crib an hour later, but I felt completely defeated. She has been a pretty good sleeper for a long time, and it just felt unjust that she would suddenly start having issues right before we are having a whole new baby!! AAaHHHHHhh

3. Marriage: It's not that marriage has been that hard, it's more that everything else has been so stressful it makes us both testy, and consequently testy with each other. I know part of it is how hormonal since I'm so late in the pregnancy game, which has lead to lots of crying, and what guy isn't stressed out by his lady crying? We've had lots of purely logistical talking, and not much just chill out time talking. In the last few weeks we've watched like three of those crass comedy movies just to try and chill out together for a while (it actually works pretty well...we even finally watched The Hangover). I'm hoping that having this next week off after Christmas gives us some time to be more calm with each other.

This is my official whiney post since January told me I should whine more :) Fortunately I am writing all this right before we get our week off between Christmas and New Years, and it is going to rock!! We are going to stay up late together watching movies and eating junk food, get the baby stuff ready to go, play in the backyard, and reconnect as much as possible. We are even planning a fancy date night in the city.

-November

5 comments:

  1. Good whining! I hope everything turns around and works out and the kids behave!

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  2. My dear, this is a most excellent whining post!

    #1 - I am really praying on this one. I hope A finds something new that will help all of this, and that your new job will be a source of greater help and not just greater problems.

    #2 - Oh, my goodness! Sounds like necessity really is the mother of invention. Praying for your sanity, and peace with little L, especially when baby J arrives. As I'm not a mama, I have no sage wisdom on this. How is her napping during the day? Could adjustment on that end help the nighttime sleep situation?

    #3 - You're right. Lady Crying Often = Upset Hubby. I hope you can really reconnect and recharge over Christmas.

    Love,
    January

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  3. I agree - good whining! It helps to just get it all out sometimes.

    "hemorrhaging money" - yep, I totally know what you mean. This year doesn't seem as bad as last year (we bought two new cars between Nov. 15 and Dec. 31 - I won't ever do that again!)...but geez, payday has become more like exchange day...money in, money out start over again.

    Your upcoming week sounds amazing! Enjoy every minute of it.

    Merry Christmas!

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  4. Jan: Thanks! It did feel good to spill my stresses. The situation has gotten better with L, mainly by just moving her bedtime back a little. As much as I will miss the 7pm bedtime, having her go peacefully to sleep at 8 is worth it.

    Rebecca: Haha, yeah paydays are usually, now we can pay all our bills days. And I really just want to go buy new clothes :) but not in the cards right now!

    November

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  5. I'll be praying for your family and job security. Money is so darn hard to come by ... and keep! Hoping L gets better about sleeping! I know that adds to your stress.

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